1. Father Stories
2. Coming Out Stories
3. Support Stories

Hearing stories of how others have dealt with issues similar to your own may help you strengthen your relationship with your family. This is only the beginning of your journey. PFLAG can connect you with other people and families that have faced and tackled issues similar to your own.

Herein is a list of stories from our site. I give a brief quote from each story so you may choose which to read. After you read a story, click on the 'Back' button (top left) and it will bring back to this page.

Words of Wisdom
Having a gay child pits the instinct of parental love against entrenched social norms. To resolve the conflict, family members need to find answers to questions about human values and the meaning of personal integrity. At PFLAG, we undertake the search with a community of fellow seekers motivated by the same pressing concerns. It's a process with wonderful rewards, not the least of which is an expanding appreciation of the riches of human diversity. -- Bishop Melvin Wheatley

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Father Stories

Unconditional Love
(San Diego PFLAG parent)
Every single day, Art hears some kind of gay joke or comment made by the people he works with. This may not bother some, but as a 26-year veteran of the police force, Art says he doesn't appreciate the comments nor does he tolerate it - especially coming from those sworn to protect everyone.

Dad is proud of 'out-and-proud' son
(San Diego PFLAG parent)
David and his wife have two sons living in Los Angeles. The oldest is straight and married, and the youngest, Andy is gay and in a committed relationship. "My son was 25 when he came out, on April 22, of 1995," David says. "He was able to come out young enough to really live the life he should be living. We went to our first PFLAG meeting a couple weeks later.

For the love of Pete
by Gene Shalit
You know, that guy with the bushy hair and mustache on NBC's Today Show

My eldest son, Pete, is a physician, he's gay, he and his partner have been together for 17 years, and I wish we'd see each other more often. He graduated from the University of Washington Medical School in Seattle, where he now lectures and has a private practice. He is a Ph.D. in genetics; he was a Phi Beta Kappa at Cornell as an undergraduate; he was a prodigy in botany, beginning to grow plants at 6; and his currently finishing a book about gay men's health. Among other expertise, he is an authority on AIDS, with a great many patients. Peter is humane and intelligent, and I am crazy about him.

About Art Wirth
by Carolyn Griffin Art
Art came out in support of his gay son as well as other gays and lesbians when it wasn't fashionable to do so. He and Marian were supportive when there was little accurate information about homosexuality In the seventies being an advocate for homosexuals was rare. All that was heard was the voice of Anita Bryant and other tyrants who condemned our children.

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Coming Out Stories

My First PFLAG Meeting
by Connie
As I looked around for a seat I noticed that the only seats open were in the front. I felt that everyone in the room were looking at me. I could feel every inch of the cold brown metal chair I was sitting in. Every second that I was there I felt like getting up and leaving, but ...

TESTIMONIAL
by Barbara Rosof
How could I rebuild the life I’d lost if I was queer? I couldn’t, and so I choked off that part of me. Ignored those longings, shoved them into the closet. I didn’t notice how much of my heart I shoved in there...

Huge news
by "R"
Okay, I've got online at home now and I've got some huge news.

Well, after so much help from all of you guys, I finally came out to my mom. It was a really great feeling of being open of who I am, where I am going, what my relationship is b/w certain people, et cetera...

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Support Stories

Why we feel Pride and Gratitude toward our gay and lesbian children and anger at society's cruelty to them by Bob Bernstein
- We are grateful to our gay children for what they taught us about truth-telling and respect for human differences.
-We are proud of their courage in refusing to lie - despite society's fierce hostility to their honesty - about an important aspect of who they are.
-We are outraged at the discrimination and physical violence that is commonly their lot.

A Fighter Against Homophobia
Rhea Murray
Why?
This last year I have personally dealt with the following:
- homeless, abandoned by family, teenage lesbians living in a storage shed in the dead of winter, one was pregnant;
- a desperate search for a teenage boy who was attempting suicide- luckily we reached him at the very moment he was taking an x-acto knife to his wrists;
- a seventeen year old sitting in my living room who just had the hospital bind his wounds from a recent gaybashng to have me help bind the more permanent wounds on his dignity;
- this weekend a gay youth in my son's support group decided life had become too unbearable and flung himself out of a speeding car.

A Mother's Intuition
by Rhea Murray
With a mother's intuition Rhea Murray suspected her 13 year old son was gay. Still, hearing the actual words from his mouth rattled her. She went to church, asked God to change her son, and was met with bone-crushing silence. Her faith in religion was shaken.

Gentle Wisdom
by Barefoot Ron
PARENTS: Don't underestimate for a minute how important it is for you to be supportive to your gay/lesbian especially, in the first few minutes AFTER they come out to you.

KIDS: Don't underestimate for a minute how big a transition this is for your parents. Be prepared to be supportive and to find resources for them. Be prepared for a backlash, and understand that they may have some stages to go through. Stick with them, be there for them...

"My Son is Now My Daughter"
by Just Evelyn
My new experience and chance to grow came when my youngest son at the age of 15 came to me one night and told me he needed to be a girl, he was a girl inside.

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